the new

Always thought that rivers were nice to look at, but never really saw myself spending a lot of time actually in one. Well I am now no longer a Murray River virgin..and I've got the bug. Immersing yourself in a flowing dark body of water is quite a liberating experience. Throw caution to the wind and dive in..sure there is a metaphor for life in there. Anyway, its great to be open to new things, rather than just pigeon holing ourselves. I love the ocean and it is a different sensation being tossed among the waves. But when in Rome..So besides the references to water, embracing the new brings in things that we could have never predicted. Coming up to Christmas and the New Year makes us re evaluate or take stock of our lives so far. So in that vein, put on your curiosity  cap and go explore the world around you. And most importantly, enjoy the experience!

'It's my party'

I am one of those people who shares their birthday with the silly season. I kinda love it, as Christmas is one of my favourite holidays..a white Christmas in New York is definitely on the wish list. However, as I was planning my birthday thing this year - and I'm having 2 :), I found that I began censoring myself. The cheeky inner critic telling me things like I was 'too old' or 'too greedy'. The thing is, conditioning is a nasty thing - like diet shakes. We need to see it for what it truly is - unnecessary noise. Acting on impulse and having fun is what life is all about - so here's to embracing the silly season!

so many tears i cried..

This was part of the chorus in one of rock God Lenny Kravitz' beautiful tunes. As today was singing day, I have a whole bunch of different songs in my head. This one in particular strikes a chord with me however as he is really putting himself out there. Because, really, what's the point in not doing that. Note to self there, take my own sage advice :) At the moment, I'm getting stupidly excited about my weekend in Sydney. Primarily for reiki training. But also a touch of swimming, shopping and ballet viewing thrown in. I love visiting my old home, as I get a chance to check in, so to speak. This visit will prove particularly poignant, as I say a real goodbye to an old flame - which was maybe the subconscious reason for my headline. It is indeed bittersweet that the passing of times brings with it the inevitability of change.I am not the same person, cue the farewell to old flames. No regrets about having gone there and now going away from that. The necessary tears, chocolate and retail therapy trips brought me to where I am now.  As for the putting myself out there, for me that means standing strong enough to hold up my dreams on a daily basis - as there are many and my wish list for life keeps growing. Part of the excitement for me in Sydney is seeing the big Christmas tree - it is truly magical and serves as a reminder of my mini me. So as the clock starts to signal time to sleep, may your dreams be merry, joyful and magical. Ps in case you were wondering, the name of the song is 'It ain't over till it's over'.

true glamour never dies...

That's the catch phrase on the disturbing, but amazing 'Grey Gardens'. Thanks to a spider bite, I had an excuse to lie on the couch and watch this doco. Drew Barrymore did indeed give a wow performance. It was quite shocking what happened to these two throughout the course of the film. As a mother and a daughter, they became co - dependent on each other, everything else going out the window.  Quite literally, the house 'Grey Gardens' that became their world fell to pieces around them. I'd always been really fascinated by old places, but this one had disturbing added in to the mix. I at times felt nauseated by looking at the state that their house had got into. Such a far cry from the high society life that her husband had provided her with initially. Which left me feeling really disapointed..I felt like screaming at her at times, to tell her to do something for herself.  While the knight in white shining armour was off bread winning, she was sun bathing and not really much else. Anyway, you know what's coming next..self-sufficiency, not relying on a man etc. But really, we were all put on this earth to do something and we all can do many things. So I guess what became disturbing about watching this was the reminder that it gave me. It is comforting to all of us to be looked after, but in the end she couldn't look after herself and leeched off her daughter instead. Many of us rely on others from time to time, which is beautiful , but its the making someone else responsible for our wellbeing that I have problems with. Anyway, that is probably enough of a rant for a Sunday :) Needless to say, I did find the film confronting but maybe in a bit of a way comforting. Every day we have the chance to nurture ourselves. Every day is in many ways a clean slate, where we can learn from our mistakes. And any day we can choose to walk away to find a different path. That's where I think true glamour lies...

Brad, burns and bottlenecks

At the risk of feeling like I'm back at school (which oddly enough I am), I decided against blogging due to the flash flooding on Dean St. So, being the safety first girl that I am; I took a breather. The mission drive through the floods was well worth it as I treated myself to the new Brad movie. Baseball never looked so good..but in all seriousness it was a good movie, well written by 'The Social Network's Sorkin. It reminded me that sometimes opportunity knocks on our door, only to make us more aware of the ones that are closer to both our home and our heart. On that note, a girly dinner is awaiting my presence...adios amigos.

fake it till you make it

Was having a coffee at my local this morning and one of my yogi friends commented that I was living a 'rock star life'. I guess you could say that it really isn't too far from the truth. My mum always did used to say that I had a 'champagne taste'. But I think that's important, letting the princess or prince side in us out, more than just on 'special occasions'. When working in a casual position, it can be even more of a challenge at times. Which makes the rewards even greater. My new lease on life, so to soeak has come about through the underrated pursuit they call goal setting. After a beautiful yoga workshop yesterday (try dru yoga if you have not done so yet), this was our homework. To sit and think about the important goals in our life - mentally, physically and spiritually. It keeps you accountable and working towards all the desires in our hearts. Hence the title of this blog. Yeah, I am taking singing lessons, it's not at the moment something I receive money for...but fake it till you make it honey. As the song says, we are all rock stars x

ordinarily ordinary

Expectations. The plans that I had keep on changing..what is the message in this? Going with the flow for me has never been my forte. However, I think there is a lot to be said for it, as it's where life happens really. The saying goes that the only certainties that exist are death and taxes.  But I think there is something else, that gives me comfort in tough and uncertain times..things pass. Change is a constant and when you resisit it, the experience is really quite ordinary. I think that's all I really want to say tonight, as the process of change for me at the moment has left me a bit spent. Have fun taking flight fellow butterflies.

You are beautiful

Yes that's right. You. Say it out loud (changing it to the first person of course). Put it on your mirror. Heard a singer use these words in one of his beautiful tunes as the sunset was having its own show outside. It reminded me of how much beauty there is in each of us. Often times this gets overlooked or minimalised by our thoughts and actions. So sometimes we need a little reminding. The odd treat for ourselves doesn't hurt either. There is a beautiful book called 'The Artist's Way'. One of the tasks in the book is to take yourself on an 'artist date' regularly. Mine is often a movie, as this is a safe bet. But I also have come to realise that the more we give ourselves a good shake up...i.e. doing something that ruffles your feathers. Mine tonight was going to a gig on my own. Was great..fear is only a facade. So have fun starlets and go get your feathers ruffled. xo

flying fairy dust

Apparently fairy dust can only make you fly if it is accompanied by a happy thought. So spoke my singing teacher, paraphrasing the words of Robin Williams' Hook. It did the trick, as my notes finally took flight and were no longer caught in my throat, so to speak. It's the same old thing of taking one's own advice. I teach teens about the importance of empowering thoughts, but sometimes overlook pruning my own garden. And it's a lot of fun, the happy thinking game. Brings you back to the innocence and freedom that is just part of your nature as a small child. My happy thoughts in singing class were full of faraway places and magic, possibly conjured up by the 'Hook' reference. Taking on a creative pursuit is one thing, but really stepping into it and having fun is the one small step that makes all the difference. So sleep, as Shakespeare would say 'perchance to dream'.

fairytales and folly

What it is about a white dress and a diamond ring? It can make us feel weak at the knees and bring tears to our eyes. Or is that just me...? I've come to realise, however, that there is no 'one size fits all' approach to weddings and 'forever after'. I can't find it in a little blue box. Even though it is interesting trying. Fairytales are great. As a kid, my favourites were 'The Last Unicorn' and 'The Neverending Story'. The idea of a happily ever after set in a magical place had me transfixed in its world of wonder. Growing up to be a big kid, advertising preys on these fantasies. It's no mistake that many women fall for a Tiffany diamond. The advertisement of the damsel being whisked off her feet and made to feel special by a handsome prince had us at hello. I'm consciously trying to avoid the creeping cynicism that I can feel...I love romance, there is very much a place for it. Even more, a need for it in a somewhat switched off society. What I don't love is that at times, we are not encouraged to read the fine print. Everyone else is doing it, why can't I? In reading the fine print I have learnt that being the odd one out is ok. It's not about having the boxes ticked at a certain age. Going against the grain should be the new norm. Find and follow your own heartbeat ladies, we are all princesses. And there are indeed many princes out there, just don't go blindly where angels fear to tread. Sweet dreams xx

flying away

Off to the big bad city tomorrow that I once called home. The thing I'm looking forward to most is jumping into the ocean and then soaking up some sun on the sand. A coffee from my favourite little cafe will also go down nicely. I got asked the other day if I was going to stay in my 'fish out of water' country town or return home. I don't think I want to be in a smog filled home anymore. That used to really scare me as it was really all I knew. Stepping away from it, some would say running away, gave me a chance to breathe again. Don't get me wrong, I miss some of the dear friends and of course my family..but I just think it was and is too much of a payoff. I love the fact that in a country town, life is a lot simpler. Ironically it has also provided me with more opportunities. I got a job offer today for a London position..which was something that, up until a while ago, I had my heart set on. Right from where I'm sitting now, it's really the furthest thing from my mind. Simplicity brings space...I always thought I wanted to keep running around and finding new things. Now I'm really enjoying the answers that can be found in stillness. Namaste and may you find some time to take some deep breaths today..wherever you are.

Being kept on your toes

Saw a beautiful little film called 'Catfish' last night and it had such a poignant message about losing ouselves in the journey of others. This woman who once wanted to be a dancer and had the potentail to, gave it all away, only to later find herself trapped and sorrounded literally by disabilty and ilness. If that's not an extended metaphor, then I don't really know what is. So we are all given the gift of life - and it is a gift that is full of possibilities. But all too often people, myself included, trade those possiblities for the 'safety' that security brings. I still dance, even though I am older than the 'typical' dancer is. It is like oxygen to me. So whatever it is that makes you smile beautiful people, please don't turn your back on it. One day too it may come back to haunt you. xx

blank spaces...

A good friend of mine used to remind me of the importance of blank spaces in one's day..times where nothing is planned. Tonight I actually did that.. had time to have a long shower, read the local paper over dinner and talk about random things with my flatmate. I don't feel as if I necessarily achieve anything, but my mind feels better for it. It's in these blank spaces that dreams are created. It's also surprisingly an opportunity for goals to be achieved as we can back to ourselves. In my post dinner blank space, I chatted with a friend on facebook and organised stuff to do when in Sydney. Have some blank spaces where time is 'wasted', it really is a nice self indulgent thing. PS Ice cream and or tim tams complement this time well. x

The fat lady has sung

I like that an opera analogy is used when referring to the end of a chapter in one's life. I guess life really is an opera - its ups and downs, trials and tribulations so to speak. Each chapter, or experience bringing us closer to the path we are meant to be on. I do believe that - destiny. You know in your gut when you stray away from it. Sometimes we don't heed the call of the famous fat lady, only to cry about it later when we splutter back onto our path. But thank God for tears, the cathartic little morsels that they are. I was faced today with a chapter from my past and it was, as is often the case, bitter sweet. I was glad to have had the experience and to have been reminded of it, while also being reminded that some challenging times lay ahead as I forge a new life for myself. The feeling in my gut that I am listening to, however, does remind me that the good old universe is indeed unfolding as it should. Goodnight girls and boys. xx

Getting in the groove

Madonna's words from the 80's are so true..get into the groove. I just got back from dance class..my part time addiction. It's such a great way to shed a layer and cloak yourself in a good dose of self confidence instead. I could have stayed home with the rain, the tim tams and a dvd player..but yeah..no Much better plan to have a boogie instead. Tim tams, as great as they are, can wait for another night when I don't have the opportunity for boogie time. Feeling quite virtuous now as I write this and drink my peppermint tea. Guess its just another day in paradise..sweet dreams sweethearts xx

crushing on you..and you..and you x

My flatamte has a crush..she has a few and I think its great. A crush reminds us of the lighter side of life, of not taking ourselves too seriously. And how good is it to wake up from a yummy dream about the male lead in 'Offspring'! I don't think she intends to do anything about any of these crushes, as tends to be the case for most crushees. But it can teach us to laugh at ourselves and it can even show us a gutsy side we never knew we had should we dare to act on the crush..

I'll leave you with that thought for your sunny Sunday. Enjoy whatever comes your way. xx

'Who stole my cheese?' moment

Not sure if that's the phrase I'm looking for, but I'm talking about the expiry of inspiration. Maybe it's my early onset of Alzheimers striking again, I had all these ideas for a great blog earlier today. However, I was too busy concentrating on my turn out and lack thereof to have the chance to write anything down. Anyway, today was quite productive. The fish out of water went to work at the theatre..got to people watch and see a great show. I can't believe I got paid for it, love the random things that can happen to us when we least expect it. Was reminded about the importance of standing out from the crowd, along with standing up for what you believe in.
So on that, I'll leave you with this to ponder..
I chose Julian Rocks as the address for this blog, as it is one of the most beautiful places on earth (the earth that I have visited anyway). Unfortunately, the fisheries wat to revoke its marine park status. So if for some reason you, like myself, have an expiry of inspiration moment,: recall the places you love. And ask yourself, what impact am I going to have on my world today? Remember, there is no act too small. xx 

Explanation, unedited

You can take the girl away from her island home, but you can't take the island from inside of her heart. One finds new things when they travel to a different place to call home. I never quite got what the saying 'home is where the heart is' meant but now I do get that it doesn't matter where you go as long as you come back to you. Challenges are part and parcel of this. You may wake up one day with a fuzzy memory of how things used to be, only to realise that you are a different size now (both literally and metaphoriacally).

That's all for now folks as coffee is calling.

Thought for the day: look at yourself in the mirror and smile. The present is a present xx